As a married male, I can say that when I confessed my desire for a spanking to my wife, she was disgusted and refused to play, telling me to find someone else to do that. I have done and have played and enjoyed it, but it is not the same as having you partner do it for you. This has made me even more guarded about admitting it to anyone in fear of the reaction that I might get, once its said, you can't unsay it.